'I'm always looking for the Hows and the Whys and the Whats,' said Muskrat, 'That is why I speak as I do. You've heard of Muskrat's Much-in-Little, of course?'
'No,' said the child. 'What is it?'
- The Mouse and his Child. Russell Hoban.

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Friday, 31 October 2008

Tongue


I was in the supermarket queue some years ago waiting for my assorted purchases to jiggle along the belt to be swiped.  When the tongue (beef, whole, black and pink, wrapped in plastic) arrived under her hand, the young teen-aged check-out operator did a flinch.  Then a nervous poke with forefinger and remarked "Oooh yuk, what is it?"
"A cow's tongue".
"Oooh yuk, is it for your dog?"
"Nope.  For my kids".
"Oooh yuk.  How old are they?"
"About your age.  Two boys at college, girl at intermediate".
"Oooh gross!  Do they like it?"
"They love it.  They may not know what it is because I slice it up".
"Ooooooh.  What's your boys' names?  I might know them".
I gave her their names and, to the slight irritation of the waiting members in the queue, we finally established that she didn't know them, and therefore could not (presumably) have the pleasure of enlightening them about their mother's duplicitous culinary practices.
At last my groceries were in my bags.  As I paid she announced firmly
"There's NO WAY I could ever eat that"
"Why not?" enquired next-in-line middle-aged woman.
"Well, yuk, it comes out of a cow's mouth!"
Next-in-line middle-aged woman smiled sweetly at her and replied
"Eat eggs, do you?"


7 comments:

  1. The end of that story is superb. So funny. Tongue is delicious isn't it but I must say I also prefer it not to actually look like a tongue! Don't think the French would have any qualms. Ever been at the meat counter in a French supermarket? Jesus. They'll eat anything - even little green estate agents.

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  2. What a neat line!! I laughed out loud reading that post. Poor girl, she probably gave up eating after all that...
    Ms Soup

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  3. Nice ending to that one!
    There is a little tavern in the middle of nowhere (near the farm) that serves pickled tongue. It's delicious. I don't think the people at PETA would approve.

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  4. Eat eggs do you? LOL!

    I must admit I like tongue but could never, ever prepare it. I can do heart, kidney, liver ... but not tongue.

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  5. PETA... Pickled Tongue-Eating Association?

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  6. I'm here browsing looking for theme music. But I had to stop at this post. I'm guessing it will generate a new post on mine. Love the PETA too!!!!

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  7. PETA=people eating tasty animals.

    I've often pondered who was brave enough to eat the first egg. I mean really....can you just see two prehistoric type people sitting around with a chicken? "Oh look Oorg, that just popped out of the chickens arse! Oh, I know, let's eat it!!"

    Pecking good post Perhaps said with a bit of tongue in cheek.

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